Worst. Tour. Ever. (Prove me wrong.)

If you are looking for that boring walking tour where i will teach you how to buy tickets for the subway, this is not it. Sorry. Google can help you with that.
All the facts about everything are available on your cellphone. You don't need me for that.
But you don't just want just facts. You want stories. You want to be entertained. And you definitely don't want to follow a guide that's just going to drop names and dates that you will forget, do you?
If you dare to explore the stories of this city from the eyes and the big mouth of a guy that's going to ask you where you are coming from, not because he cares, but because he wants to know in advance in which part of the tour will he insult your culture (because eventually, he will), welcome.
This experience is the crossover between a Stand-up comedy show, a walking tour, and a roast. You will either absolutely hate it and leave in the first 10 minutes, or you'll recommend it to your friends. There's no in-between.
After doing walking tours for the last 5 years, I created my "guided visit Magnum Opus/Piece de Resistance/Masterpiece/(insert another synonym in a fancy language)". The ultimate story of Lisbon, divided in 3 episodes, for 3 different areas of the city. Each one lasting around 2h/2h30.
"WORST. TOUR. EVER." is the first part of my vision of this incredible city where i was lucky enough to be born and live most of my life. But it's not for the faint of heart or for the easily offended.
And if you survive this first part... good news: there's more.